Today is the Anniversary of the 911 disaster that happened 6 years ago. Still thinking about it today breaks my heart. I wanted to take this opportunity of expressing in this blog of what I wrote that very day back in 2001, just a few hours after the twin towers were hit by high jacked airplanes destroying so many lives and making us all as a nation to sit up and realize what had happened, and why we all cried together as a nation.
America Stood Still Today~911
I had to remind myself to breath several times today, as I got dizzy just watching the news and what took place.. I had to let out breaths of air as if coming up from underwater.
This is reality in the worst way, but as I watched the news, it seemed so unreal as I had never experienced anything like this before, and hopefully never will again. But it did happen. I have to grasp that and remember.
Magnificent towers of Businesses and lives, reaching toward the skies as if trying to touch space itself were hit by American planes filled with innocent people with no control, capturing and distinguishing lives on fire that could not be put out with a blow. But the blow touched everyone and always will. As I watched, the towers tumbled and then fell, with the dust and smoke reaching way beyond the 100 stories. But the dust of what happened will never settle. As they fell with the lives in them, the Nation was hit as if lighting. America, USA our Nation was struck, and forever will be touched.
As the strong construction of the Twin Towers crumbled and smoke expanded higher than the buildings themselves, I broke down and cried personally, as well as many in this great Country did. Millions of lives were touched, and we have no way of knowing how many were changed and destroyed. No one can measure the gallons or inches of tears that have or will fall in time.
Some of these measurements are personal and not to be recorded. One can only imagine! But think big!! Reality of tears will go on for years and will never be measured. While my own personal feelings become evident, I need to remember and think and act on it. Did I tell my child, family, my husband, my friend "I LOVE YOU". I need to do it now. Taking things for granted are no longer accepted.
While I watched the buildings of the Twin Towers & Pentagon tumble, rumble with devastation and smoke and then fall before my eyes, I had to remind myself that they are only buildings - Man made!! But, the people inside of them were our stepping stones of our Nation, our future. The victims, casualties and heroes cannot be rebuilt, never saved and with their loss and hurt of burning, hurting, devastation; their families and friends and all who loved them suffer along and always will. Forever.
While I think, mourn and grieve on this, it is not just the victims in these buildings. This is a much bigger picture. The America Airlines crashing into the buildings with no choice ( or so we hope) What were they feeling, thinking, praying while they knew that death was near and intimate? Who were they going to visit, what friend or family, what business meeting were they going to attend. How many knew them and loved them and will never get the stories out of them. What will the "little black boxes" on the plane tell us about them? While I know nothing about them, I mourn and grieve for them and grieve for their families.
While this tragedy goes on and will for ever, I also think of the heroes efforts, and their strong and brave stands must be remembered. My heart felt as never before as I heard that over 200 fire fighters were missing. How many more of police, emergency and just day to day caring people, and other heroes are we going to grieve over as a Nation?
While my heart skips more beats that I had hoped for, I go back to my own life and family. All of a sudden all my aches and pains and psychological problems are no where close to what this Nation has just experienced. Especially the families that are suffering more than I will ever understand or experience on a day to day basics. There are no words or thoughts of how I can put this. The magnitude of these events reach higher than most can comprehend. My own thoughts are "AMERICA HAS BEEN GROUNDED"" and cannot go further than that. My personal grief as an American is devastating, but cannot reach what the family or victims will experience.
As a victim of nightmares myself, I can only understand my own scares, but while I do, I will lay my head down tonight and think of the victims, their families, loved ones and the survivors. I know that many nights of screams and sweats will awaken them. It hurts me that I cannot console them.
This is a wake up call for AMERICA. DID WE MISS A WARNING? AMERICA IS UNDER ATTACH!! How do we deal with this?
My thoughts on this are that I am heartbroken, stunned, and have no power to help. Yet, as I feel this, I still believe that this is the greatest country in the world. I still cry every time I hear the NATIONAL ANTHEM. I still get goose bumps when "GOD BLESS AMERICA" is played or sung. I always get emotional with "I AM PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN"!
This is certainly the most tragic, traumatic, stunning, devastation act that my 47 years have experienced. But, I have to believe that the US, AMERICA will pull together and work through this with love and strength and support. Character, backbone, morals and values make this a great Nation. My hope of all hope is not just that "peace is WON" but "PEACE IS ONE". We will get through this. I know we will.